


Twenty Five

by Venstar



Series: Meaningless Scars [25]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-16 06:32:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15431073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Venstar/pseuds/Venstar
Summary: From the 2017 fest anonymous prompt: Q finds out about Alec and decides that this failed friendship is why Bond won't accept new relationships.  He decides to find Alec as a suprise, but the surprise is on him--he misunderstood Bond and Alec's previous relationship.





	Twenty Five

Oh well, that was a bad idea. That was a terribly bad idea. A hugely, terribly, bad idea, Q thought to himself as he watched the huge man grasp the back of a chair and drag it slowly towards where he lay crumpled up against a brick wall.

“You realize you talk out loud when you think, yes?” The man asked, his drawl and accent a muddled Britishized Russian accent. Or was it a Russianized British accent…

“It’s...a thing. I can have a thing right?” Q asked. Oh he was so in over his head. Someone was going to kill him, he wasn’t even sure if it was this big bloke or his bosses or maybe the person he was trying to fight for. Q watched as the man finally, ever so slowly finished dragging the chair directly in front of him. The evil bastard decided to make it some sort of villainous sort of strip show chair tease, as he also SLOWLY and maddeningly removed his black overcoat and draped it across the back of the chair. The man paused at the little smile on Q’s face.

“What?”

“I’m just wondering when the show will start. I’ve paid my entrance fee, I think.” Q wiped at the blood coming out of his split lip. “Be a good boy and make it a nice and fast grind, hmmm? I like it a bit hard.” Q threw back his head and laughed at his own stupid joke.

“You crazy? No? Maybe a little. Maybe you have to be, if you like to hang out with MI6.” The man said.

Q stopped laughing. “And what do you know about MI6. What does anyone know of MI6. Ghosts and shadows living in the past.”

The man made his way around the chair,sat down and crossed his legs. “So they say.” He lit a cigarette, the light flaring and illuminating his face. Long sandy brown hair scraped against his collar and square jaw. Scars draped in light and deep shadows splashed across high cheekbones. His eyes met Q’s. “Normally I’d prefer one of these after bedroom antics, but there is no place in my bed for you. Too bony.”

Q laughed again. “Ah, the story of my life. If you only knew how many bed partners had turned me down because I wasn’t their ‘type.’ What’s a type anyway. A man’s a man and if you like bloke’s then one should be as good as another right?” Q asked this question to his captor.

The man leaned to the side, examining Q. “No meat on you. What is there to grab on a cold night?” The man laughed, smoke drifting towards Q.

“Hey, I’ll have you know that I’m extremely flexible. Meat, as you call it gets in the way of that. You ever see a rugby player do this?” Q on some suicidal whim decided to put his leg behind his head. “See? Can they do that? Can you do that? Why does no one appreciate that?” Q let his leg go and it slid to the floor. “Ow.”

The man chuckled. “I can appreciate it, sure.” He leaned forwards and studied his hands in the glow of his cigarette. “I am also sure you have someone else who can appreciate it.”

Q snorted and leaned back. “You think he would, wouldn’t you...Alec.” Q raised his eyebrows and drew a zero and a tick mark in the air. “However, he hasn’t had a chance to appreciate it because of you.”

It was Alec’s turn to raise his eyebrows. “Me?”

“Yes you.” Q made a come closer gesture with his hand. “If you’re not going to appreciate my flexibility, can I at least have a cigarette. One of us should appreciate me.”

Alec chuckled as he withdrew a cigarette from his pack. He stood with it and crouched down in front of Q. He tucked a strand of Q’s hair behind his ear, straightened his glasses and swiped a thumb across Q’s split lip. He touched the tip of the spare cigarette to his, lighting it, before he pressed the filtered end to Q’s mouth.

Q inhaled and removed the cigarette to exhale, directly into Alec’s face. “I’ve a proposition for you.”

Alec sat back on his heels. “Oh. Does it require one of us to be flexible?”

Q grinned. “Sort of. I’d like to ask you some questions and then I’d like to be allowed to leave.”

“Leave? I’m afraid once you are in my hands, there is no escape.” Alec said. “I keep all that belongs to me.”

Q inhaled and exhaled another puff of smoke. “Well that got kinky really fast.”

“I am a fast man,” Alec said. He rose from his crouch and walked back to the chair.

“As tempting as your backside is, Alec. I’m afraid you’ll have to let me go. I only came for some answers, nothing more.” Q smiled, tilting his head and admiring the long legs in front of him.

Alec looked over his shoulder and gave a wiggle. “You like what you see, then stay for the show. Nothing is for free.”

Q gave Alec a slow and lazy smile. “I’m afraid nothing is for free and neither is my company. As I said, a few questions and then I’ll go. That’s the payment I require from you and by my calculations, you have five minutes before MI6 shows up at your doorstep, so do be quick answering.”

Alec’s eyebrows drew close to each other. “That is impossible. I checked you myself. Nothing from Q-branch was on you, I took everything from you that could have given out a signal and left it where I took you.”

Q inhaled, exhaled and gave a little puff, forming a smoke ring and smiled beatifically at Alec. “Except, you forgot, or perhaps you didn’t know. I am Q-branch.” Q laughed at the amount of swearing Alec was doing in several languages, some even he didn’t know.

“Why you little cunt! Out of your rat’s lab for want of what? Honor and glory? You bring them here, to me!” Alec rose from his seat, looking slightly panicked.

Q of course, looked calm and collected. Not worried that he’d just angered a wild bear. “No, not the entirety of MI6, think of the ticketing fees and logistical nightmares. Oh no. It’ll just be one man. One man, who doesn’t appreciate my flexibility, because he seems to be a bit broken from the way you left him.”

“What?” Alec looked confused. “What man...what way…”

‘Click’

“Oh.” Alec raised his hands, the glowing end of his cigarette highlighting the narrowed blue eyes behind him and the edges of short cropped blond hair. “Hello, James.”

“Hello to you too Alec. Q, you have some explaining to do.”

“Me?” Q squawked. “I think you both have some explaining to do and I’m not leaving until this is worked out!” Q crossed his arms stubbornly across his chest. “I’m prepared to sit here all night, until you two either beat the shit out of each other or talk. Either one is fine with me. I figure you might be more amenable after he’s pounded a concussion into your thick head, but then what do I know.”

“My thick head!” James’s voice exploded behind Alec. Even Alec flinched at the sound of it.

“Maybe you talk less, Q” Alec muttered at Q.

“NO.” Q put the cigarette out on his hand. “You talk. Both of you.”

“I don’t know what game you’re playing here, Q, but I will inform M…”

“You’ll inform M of what? That I singlehandedly found 006? That after years of watching you mope about whining about your precious bookend in 006, I finally find him and you’re just going to what? Arrest him, turn me over to M, go about moping?

“You moped?” Alec asked, a laugh hiding in his sentence.

James pressed his gun harder against Alec’s shoulder. “Shut up.”

“I mean, you could have said you loved him.” Q said, speaking to both of them. “And that you didn’t want to stay and you didn’t want to go. That you were both unhappy.”

“Where did you get this kid from?” Alec asked, gesturing to Q. “Is he for real?”

“M dragged him out of some back alley,” James mumbled, trying for snark.

“Is he really that flexible in bed?”

“What?”

“What?”

Q laughed.


End file.
